How to Build Self Confidence

How to Build-Self Confidence

When we are going about our daily lives one of the most vital things can affect us is confidence, or the lack of it. We all need confidence from time to time to help us deal with whatever life throws at us, whether that be meeting new people, going for an interview, bringing up our children or anything else that comes along. It’s also true, isn’t it, that some of us may need a little more confidence than others at different times.

Sometimes when people lack feelings of confidence it can be because they either forget or aren’t aware where those feelings REALLY come from. They often look on the outside rather than the inside, looking for validation and compliments from other people. If they don’t come then they can feel bad.

True self-confidence doesn’t depend on the opinions of others; we can build it for ourselves.

Here are the first steps.

Sort out your self-talk

What we tell ourselves really does determine how we feel. If we tell ourselves we’re going to feel nervous or low, we generally do. However, if we tell ourselves that we can feel confident and in control the mood is totally different.

Pay attention to the positives

We seem to pay more attention to, and internalise, negative things we hear about ourselves than the positive things. We tend to either ignore or dismiss those, sometimes because it feels “big headed” to enjoy them. Start saying “thank you” to compliments, whether you believe them at first or not and use them to feel good.

Do your Confidence CV

Get a pad and a pen and write down the answers to the following questions. What are my best qualities? What am I most proud of in life? When am I at my most confident and why? What do my closest friends say that I’m good at? If you find the exercise difficult imagine how your best friend or closest family member would answer. If it’s still too tough then actually ask them and get them to help you.

A commitment to doing something positive for yourself is the key to building those feelings of confidence. Enjoy and let me know how you get on!

If this is a subject that affects you call Mark Darlington on 0800 043 1946 or use the contact section of the website. Mark is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Success Coach based in Flintshire. His Hypnotherapy rooms are within easy reach of Mold, Deeside, Flint and Chester.

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