How to fail miserably at anything you want

I’m not quite sure where he’s got it from but from time to time my seven year old son declares that it should be “Opposite Day”. This is a topsy, turvy day when everything you say or do has to be the opposite. Hilarious to a seven year old!

Today he has declared an Opposite Day. So as I usually give tips on how to succeed and have a better life – today’s tip is the opposite, a blueprint for failure.

You may decide you really don’t want to achieve any lasting success in your lifetime. Is it fair that I keep pushing and prodding if someone is content leaving behind a legacy of disappointment and misery? Maybe not, so this is for all the people who want to have goals but not achieve them.

Make your goals vague

When setting your goals, use adjectives such as “more” and “some.” Goals like “I want to make more money” or “I want to lose some weight” virtually guarantee your progress will be minimal. Be as wishy-washy as possible. And while you’re at it, you might want to set a goal of getting a job doing something else.

Think and speak negatively about your goals

Try using words like “I can’t” and “It’s too hard”. Saying things to yourself such as “I can’t get a promotion,It’s too hard to take on more responsibility” will certainly keep you exactly where you are. If you can work up enough courage to tell your boss directly, he or she will almost definitely avoid promoting you from that point on. Who knows, you might get lucky and get fired!

Avoid planning action steps

Take a goal – even a specific goal like “I will comfortably retire when I am 50 and be financially secure”. Then simply leave it as-is. Don’t write down any tasks or steps you’ll need to complete in order to achieve it. Just consider the goal a wish and nothing more. Creating a step-by-step plan will only confuse matters because it’s all too easy to take action on simple steps. Action in the direction of your goal would lead to success and you definitely don’t want that.

I know you might be a bit overwhelmed with all the work you have to do to avoid reaching your goal. You might even think it’s even more work. Never fear! You can do it.

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